From Two Survivors of Rape
“This is the first that I’ve really come to terms with the fact that I won’t even be safe in spaces specifically meant for women only.”
Survivor A:
“I went to an evaluation for PTSD after I was raped. The facilitator at the research center was a man with his hair in pigtails. I felt very uncomfortable being in such a vulnerable position with a man.
We were alone in the room with the door closed and there were several times that he hovered his body over mine to look at the computer screen. When I tried to ask him a question he raised his voice at me to cut me off; it was clear that all he cared about was getting through the day and wanted to keep me in my place.
He was twice my size and when I was ready to leave he blocked the doorway with his body to talk to me about paperwork. I had a visceral reaction to his boorish displays of dominance, and I left feeling shaken and humiliated.
When I got home I looked him up and saw that this facilitator identified as nonbinary and used they/them pronouns. I know that I would have felt safer and more respected with a female facilitator—especially given the circumstances—but, unfortunately, I did not have any say in the matter. I ended up crying uncontrollably as I knew I would not be able to get the help I needed for my PTSD.”
Survivor B:
“At the age of 14 I was raped by my boyfriend at the time. Although I can healthily cope with the trauma now, I still consistently have my guard up while out in public and around men I don't know if I’m by myself. In general, I would say that I’m highly afraid of men I’m unfamiliar with.
Last week I went to Target with one of my male friends so we could go shopping for dorm stuff. While there I really needed to use the restroom so that’s exactly what I did. About ten seconds after I walk into the women’s restroom I hear the door open. I then heard heavy footsteps from someone wearing heavy boots. It didn’t freak me out at first because women wear those types of boots too, but what did make me freak out was when I heard the person clear his throat and it was easily recognizable as a man. I tried to finish my business quickly but he came out of the stall while I was washing my hands. He didn’t even look like he was trying to pass as a woman whatsoever. There was visible stubble on his face and he resembled a stereotypical truck driver you see in those shows. I left Target immediately after with my friend and we didn’t buy anything. My friend had to stop me from having a panic attack after we got in my car. If he (my friend) wasn’t there, I would’ve almost definitely had a breakdown right there.
My story isn’t severe, but as someone who is a survivor, this is the first that I’ve really come to terms with the fact that I won’t even be safe in spaces specifically meant for women only. Why do I have to live in a world where men now have the “right” to torment survivors by invading our space? I shouldn’t have to use single-family restrooms now so I don’t worry about a man walking into the bathroom.
I’m only 18 and the world has glamorized my own torment. Men will never understand how it feels to be physically taken advantage of at a young age. Men that claim to be women will never understand our real biological struggles even after they get surgery.
I’m tired and I’m scared. I’m so scared to go to college and have this be normalized because of politically correct groups. Just because something is “politically correct” doesn’t mean it’s scientifically correct.
First I tell myself that I need to plan ahead so I don’t walk alone at night. Now I tell myself that I need to plan ahead so I don't have to use the bathroom or change or shower in the locker room.
Things are only going to get worse if we keep going this way. I no longer associate myself as part of the LGBT community. It was once a community where I felt accepted and respected. Now I’m told that I’m transphobic if I refuse to date a “lesbian” if “she” has a penis.
These trans trends have ultimately increased the oppression of women and put our safety at risk. When will this madness end?”
Letters From the Front is a new series from WoLF curating stories from women about how “gender identity” ideology has impacted them. We’ll share new letters, submitted anonymously, each week. Write in to share your own story!
WoLF does not necessarily endorse the content of Letters.
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