Radfems Respond: Lily Phillips and Giselle Pelicot (part 1)
The disturbing stories of Lily Phillips and Giselle Pelicot: the wrecking of the young woman, and the revelation that the everyday supposedly ‘normal’ man sees women merely as inanimate objects to use for their pleasure.
Sharon Byrne, Executive Director of WoLF:
Both events reflect a massive dissonance between the world as women see it, and how men see women. It should disturb us all.
Women believe we’re liberated, empowered, and limitless. We also desperately hope quietly and fervently, that we’ll never experience the need to sexually exploit ourselves, or sexual assault.
I watched the documentary on Lily Phillips. I cried when she said she’s going to get ‘run through by 100 guys’, because she’s ‘only good for one thing’, and then shrugs her shoulders and laughs nervously.
Her body language screams what she can’t articulate. She’s been told sex is the entirety of a woman’s worth, and she’s found a way to monetize it on a tech platform. But deep within herself she’s asking is this really all there is for me? And her soul, where a million-year-old woman resides, whose power she’s not yet tapped into, hasn’t yet managed to overpower the social conditioning she’s been subjected to. She’s mirroring what the world is telling her, and providing herself a living off it.
Some say this is the result of feminism. They don’t understand feminism. Truly empowered women don’t get exploited by the sex industry. They’re pursuing their PhD, writing important pieces of work, running a business, practicing law, medicine, running for office, becoming peacemakers, raising children, traveling, and pursuing their dreams. They’ve tossed aside mirroring the world and its delusions. They’re remaking the world to reflect them, and all the daughters to come.
Every woman who has been sexually exploited says it’s for the money, out of desperation.
Men count on that. They know there’s always a situation, geo-political or personal, or both, where a woman will finally be desperate enough to sell the only thing she still owns - herself. This is always the impediment to women achieving true equality.
Let’s move into the mental world of men. After all, 100 of them signed up to have sex with Lily for 5 minutes each on camera. Men collectively lost their minds on social media when I said, "let's turn the lens of scrutiny on the men for a moment." That was instantly met with, "SHE did this! Whore! She’s making money! Men were exploited.” And so on.
The message was clear: “Don't you dare question men! It’s our RIGHT to use and then condemn women!"
The patriarchal box Lily maneuvers within is an artificial societal construct, one that men have expended enormous energy to erect, of ‘women are only valued for their fuckability’. That construct simultaneously condemns any woman who leverages it for financial gain. She’ll be damned forever, but make enough money, get enough eyeballs - she’s taking the sole route to power for women in that limited, artificial world.
We should guide the Lilys of this world into embracing their real power, and it’s not in servicing men’s desires.
Giselle Pelicot is the formidable survivor of a nightmare scenario of rapes staged by her husband while she was drugged unconscious by him. She chose to make her case public, an awe-inspiring French Lioness with unfathomable reserves of bravery. She transformed a terrible decade-long violation of her body into incredible personal and feminine power, on a world stage, no less, a modern Joan of Arc.
What happened to her shattered a myth that both women and men have given far too much credence: not all men. Hundreds of ‘normal’ men eagerly participated in the rape of a clearly unconscious woman without a second thought. Her consent was not even a question. ‘Her husband said it was ok.’ No man went to the police. She was just an object to be used.
The rapists were bakers, plumbers, delivery drivers, locals, some married, with children. She greeted them in the village, completely unaware. In the trial, their defense attorneys tried to bring in past sexual trauma, as men also rape boys. This excuses nothing. When someone hands you a cup of poison, you have the responsibility to not hand that cup of poison to unsuspecting others. It’s basic humanity. The Everyday Normal Man failed the basic humanity test, repeatedly, when the human was a woman.
There is a huge warning to women here: you may think you have basic human rights and that social backstops like aging, marriage, and your husband will protect you from male sexual predators. You’re wrong.
Massive shifts in the exploding online porn world and a global backlash against women’s rights have seismically shifted the ground under women’s feet. Women have lost the basic human rights of personhood and self-sovereignty, to men’s fear of our progress and tech platforms that allow proliferation of images and videos depicting abuse of women and girls.
This state of affairs calls for a new feminist revolution. One in which women will not cease agitating until we’ve achieved self-sovereignty, autonomy, and full dignity of human rights.
We invite women to share their thoughts and experiences on these disturbing trends in women’s rights and safety:
